Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Argh

I feel weary. I feel as though the battle can never be won and it will be a long time before the struggle ends. But feelings aren't facts (sigh). If only the thought made the feeling go away. This is the sort of thinking which causes my therapist to try and medicate me. Nice, (big sigh).

I want to start on a, "What's it all for?" rant, but I don't have the energy. : ) It's fun being dramatic. Still...

I'm haunted from words spoken by a woman at work whose partner died in a car accident a few years ago. Weeks before it happened she told a co-worker, "I feel as though we're turning a corner."

How do you turn your thoughts away from the reality of that? It makes me numb.

How about the wife who lost her second husband in a car accident, very close to the same location where her first husband crashed his car and died. Absolutely staggering. That is tragedy.

And I have the nerve to feel sorry for myself because I'm not a natural born Pollyanna?

It would be much easier not to give a shit.


What's the likelihood of that?

"But there's a secret garden she hides..." ~ Bruce Springsteen, Secret Garden

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