What a difference

a week makes.

Wow. I literally felt like a different person last week. Anxiety is a scary thing (or hormones, as it's hard to pinpoint the real culprit). By far it's the worst emotion for me, and it's taken me many years to even learn how to combat the typically negative focus and thoughts I am naturally bombarded with. While I acknowledge my progress, I can't help but worry over what I'll be like if I get pregnant. I'm actually quite worried I might experience intense emotions which I'll not be able to combat in any prescriptive sense. Yes, I know... I'm not pregnant, so why worry?

I'm sure this sounds weak, but after experiencing seven or eight days of intense anxiety, depression and irritability, it's clear to me it isn't simply "mind over matter". I'm the first person to accept your thoughts control your feelings, but if you are chemically or hormonally overwhelmed, there is a certain lack of control. Nothing I tried last week worked. I worked out, and afterwards felt more angry and agressive. Compared to this week, after I worked out last night, I felt great.

Now my brother says he has anxiety (rolling eyes). I believe he's a hypochondriac and has developed anxiety in response to another family member's current experience with the less than pleasant emotion. : ) The truth is, my whole family tends towards hypochondria. I suppose it's some consolation I come by it honestly, but it really dosen't help in my day to day interactions with people (who I'm sure think I'm a little more than unusual).

You'd think I'd be more sympathetic of my brother and his anxiety, but... no.
: )